I'm back.. Sorry if it's been such a long time but the reason for that is basically in the title of this post. I have now been in the UK for 2 months and I'm finally on top of things.
This post might not be everyones cup of tea, but I still wanted to share it with you. Today I am going to go through everything that comes with moving back to your home country after 11 years. It might be a tad long but here it goes.
let's start with leaving, it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I said goodbye to my boyfriend, my grandmother, my mum, my step dad, my dog, my uncle and my best friend. these are all people that mean the world to me and who I have never been without. So yes it was hard but like they all said, 'you are doing this for the best of reasons' and that's what helped me get through it.
For those of you who don't know why I left sunny France, well, I left to help me accomplish my dreams ; school. Mad ! you might think, but school in France was not for me ; very academic, strict, and draining. Especially when studying literature when all I wanted to do was art and photography. So thats what I have gone and done in A levels, as well as French ( of course.. ). It is going really well so thats a positive point to focus on.
But negatives soon crept up on me. Having a long distance relationship can indeed work ; and it was... as soon as I realised that 2 years of A Levels were not going to be the end of my education in the UK ; but I could not bring myself to telling him that after he said he would wait for me for a couple of years. So I kept it from him, but me being me, I felt guilty and he felt me pull away. This carried on for about a month at the end of which I felt that although I might not come back, it was not sure, and that we truly loved each other ; so I was ready to get stuck in and make more effort and fight for what we had. But unfortunately he had also been thinking and not positively like I was ; before I could ring him I received a long message saying he had tried to call but he could not get through to me, and then explained that he could not go on with it any more that he loved me too much for me to be away. So he left me. So that was that, and to be honest I am broken and have still not heeled. All I know is that he is the most amazing person and that I wish him all the best.
Thankfully to help me on my 'quest' I have met some amazing people and made so incredible friends. But I have also kept the ones I left behind ; who I miss but I know they are still there. Of course they have not been replaced ; I am just grateful that I have been able to have new additions to the most amazing group of people, who I will cherish forever.
The hardest part about leaving was probably leaving my dearest mum and dad (step dad) who have raised me, and looked after me for so long and who I'v never been too far from. My step dad was the best thing that ever happened to my mum and I, and I would like to thank him for all that he has done for us. And my mum, is, my mum, who I love and miss more than anything. A good thing came with this ; my step sister who I have been hundreds of miles away from for 5 years is now just a train ride away and I can't wait to be able to spend more time with her !
To end this post I would like to say.. to anyone who might be considering a change like mine ; always emphasise the good things to help you get past the bad aspects of the incredible changes you might have made in your life. It will get easier and you will be one step closer to making your dreams come true.. all you need to do is keep your chin up and fight for what you want !
Last but not least I'd like to add a little message to my best friend who I sadly left behind ; @daisydotdotdot (instagram name, give her a follow !) who I miss so much and hope to see very soon. Love ya hun.
Some snaps to illustrate new things :
I hope this was not to much of a bore and I hope to be posting again soon. Bye !
Annie Olivia. X
